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December 26, 2012
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Jupiter coffee shop by igrenic Jupiter coffee shop by igrenic
;)
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Daily Deviation

Given 2013-01-14
:iconjoeltonongkh:
joeltonongkh Featured By Owner Jan 15, 2013
Impressive composition and typeface used. Nice combination of colors.
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:iconokayokayokok:
okayokayokok Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013
Do they ship to the United States?
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:iconlilshiniko:
lilshiniko Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013
The design is decent, although in my opinion the "chalkboard effect" can be a little cliché for coffee shops nowadays. I do have some issues with grammar/stylistic choices though.

High Quality Goods
vs.
High Quality of Goods

The "of" is unnecessary, just as it is in the picture above. If you are a native English speaker, read it aloud and you should understand the awkwardness. "High Quality Weed or Haze" is fine.

Also, "for best and nice atmosphere" sounds broken. "Best" is a superlative, while "nice" is only an adjective. When you say that something is the "best" you are putting it above all else. This makes the above sentence sound awkward to native English readers/speakers.

I would probably rewrite it as this:

"oriental and local products available for the best experience" (or experience could be altered to "atmosphere")

There is also an indicator above the 5 euro that says that the price starts there, but there is no similar notice above the price for coffee. Are we to assume that all coffee costs 2,50 euro? I would probably add the "starts from" that is above the price for weed/haze to the coffee as well, unless there really is a flat price for coffee. I would also remove the "list" from "Read our full menu list" because of redundancy. I'd use "Read our full menu here" and make it a link.

I would also say that the two different "names" could be confusing to some. The official name (going by the logo in the upper and lower left corners) is "Jupiter Coffee Shop" while the page itself says "Cafe Jupiter." It's really just a minor thing, but when someone is looking for a restaurant either online or in real life, you should make sure that they can find you by a specific name. You're building a brand and you want to reinforce brand recognition.

"Designed" is misspelled as "desined" in the bottom right corner.
I will assume that "Fotogallery" is intentional. But if not, it's spelled "Photo" in English. (I'm aware that many other languages use "foto" and that it has also become an acceptable "slang" spelling in English.)

Overall not bad, but not spectacular either. I'm sorry for the people who think it's awesome. Feel free to call me a hater. /shrug

But since I just saw that the artist is from the Czech Republic and I can safely assume that he is not a native English speaker, I understand the grammatical problems. Nevertheless if I were a paying customer I would be a little upset with some of the issues listed. Not that they couldn't be fixed, but it just strikes as either unprofessional or lazy. Remember, just as the coffee shop is aiming to build brand recognition, so are you as an artist. I'm not trying to be insulting, but rather offering constructive criticism. If possible, I would try to have someone who is thoroughly knowledgeable about English review a piece that contains English before you publish it.
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:iconvelvetfish:
VelvetFish Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Filmographer
hey, you know what sounds good right now?

some weed.

(gratz on the DD!)
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:icond0m1ng0:
D0m1ng0 Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Photographer
Verry nice Design but one critique! The of in "High quality of weed or haze" is unneeded and awkward.
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:iconhyenacub-stock:
hyenacub-stock Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013
Actually, taking the word "of" out, it is fine. "or haze" could also be dropped and make it simpler and still funny. : D
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:iconhemphat:
HempHat Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
May I ask you how it is unneeded and awkward? :giggle:
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:iconlilshiniko:
lilshiniko Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013
Grammatically speaking.

High Quality Goods
vs.
High Quality of Goods

The "of" is unnecessary, just as it is in the picture above. If you are a native English speaker, read it aloud and you should understand the awkwardness.
Reply
:iconhemphat:
HempHat Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Hobbyist Photographer
Perhaps it is just me, but I don't find it awkward. No idea why. :shrug:
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:iconsammuleoden:
SamMuleOden Featured By Owner Jan 14, 2013  Student Traditional Artist
.....I WANT TO GO
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